It’s hard to imagine that anyone in America might have been clamoring to see a low-budget biopic about the off-screen lives of the “Saved By the Bell” cast. But then again, Lifetime has never been known for producing anything that normal people really want to watch.
Based mostly on the supposed “tell-all book” that Dustin Diamond (“Screech” from the show) wrote a number of years back, The Unauthorized Saved By the Bell Story premieres next month. The book, titled “Behind the Bell,” has been roundly criticized and rejected by Dustin’s fellow cast members as having been completely fabricated…and understandably, they all pretty much hate him for it, since he paints most of them as self-absorbed drug-using prima donnas and sluts. That is, when he’s not claiming to have had sex with 2,000 women. If you wanted people to actually believe your book, you probably shouldn’t have included that last part, Screech.
Anyway, the Lifetime “film” is expected to follow much of what’s in Dustin’s book, true or not. And we have the first clip of it above. Put simply, it looks like a disaster. Some of the actors kinda-sorta resemble the real “Saved” cast, while others look like they were hired that day. The makeup effects and hair-coloring are horrid, and judging from the two minutes seen here, the acting is too. Also, I can’t quite figure out why the director’s chairs on the fake “set” have the names of the show characters on them, rather than the actors who portray them, but I wouldn’t be surprised if Lifetime just didn’t notice. Is there some legal reason that they’re being referred to as “Zack” and “Kelly” in this movie? I thought it was a behind-the-scenes story. Now I’m totally confused, and it angers me deeply because I really shouldn’t be thinking this much about anything related to Bayside High.
But what do you think? Am I being too hard on this one? After all, it can’t possibly be worse than Sharknado 2, right? Are you nostalgic to see new versions of Zack, Kelly, Slater and the gang for a couple of hours? Are you going to be angry to see them screwing one another and doing drugs, or do you suspect that will be the best part?
Personally, I feel the same way about “Saved By the Bell” that I do about “Full House” and like-minded shows: they weren’t that terrible during their prime, because they were basically products of their time…but unfortunately, they don’t hold up at all today. Your mileage may vary, and clearly it does, since a new season of “Full House” is supposedly in the works right now. Sound off below about your excitement — or lack thereof — for this revival.
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