Just look to Michelle Obama for everything you need to know on this one. Her embarrassment — and possible disgust — at Barack’s tendency to constantly lower the dignity of his own office with grade school jokes…was written all over her face. Indeed, the President of the United States was joking that the White House Executive Pastry Chef (yes, that’s an actual title), whom they refer to as “Crustmaster,” must be lacing his pies with crack. Tee-Hee! Meanwhile, Michelle sought to assure their audience, ‘There’s no crack in our pies,” as she laughed nervously. Thanks a ton for that, FLOTUS. I really thought he was serious there. Now please return to your day-job of attempting to ensure that schoolkids will never get to taste any pies ever again, while you and your husband joke about how scrumptious they are.

If someone truly has been lacing Obama’s pies with crack, though, at least we finally have a reasonable explanation for why he thinks he can get away with all of those executive orders: he’s smashed out of his gourd!

Actually, the real joke is the fact that even the White House pastry chef wants to quit this president! It must be truly awful to work in the Obama White House when the food service department has had enough.

By the way, in case you weren’t aware, Barack Obama REALLY loves him some pie (probably even more than he loved crack back in the day):

Every time I watch that video, I feel like someone must have dared Obama to say the word “pie” as many times as possible in two minutes. But I digress.

In a related story, Toronto Mayor Rob Ford has displayed an interest in hiring the so-called “Crustmaster,” now that he’s leaving the White House…