ISIS Is Hiring Press Officers, School Teachers, Bomb Makers

Is Bill Ayers still teaching? If not, there are some job openings that are right up his alley…

The Islamic State is working to recruit their supporters who do not wish to fight on the front lines with online job advertisements.

While not wanting to be a soldier is a “sign of weak faith,” there is still much work to be done even if you’re afraid to kill or wage jihad, the ad posted on behalf of ISIS explains.

Omar Hussain, a British jihadist who fled the UK in January 2014 to join the extremists in Syria, posted the under the name Abu Sa’eed Al-Britani. Al-Britani has previously appeared in numerous propaganda videos, including one urging the West send ground troops so extremists could send them “back one by one in coffins.”

Number one on the list is press officers for the so-called Islamic State’s “media center”—they need a spokesman to rebut all the negative PR that hurts the terrorist group’s image.

“This ‘internal media’ position would provide support from the masses as Western news outlets continue to release loads of ‘negative propaganda’, about ISIS,” Al-Britani explained.

“Bomb makers,” which Al-Britani describes as a “beautiful job for those who truly wish to reap rewards” are in high demand. Duties include making explosives and being willing to wear them as a suicide bomber.

“The brothers in the bomb making department are the core and backbone of nearly every operation,” the extremist writes. “Imagine the reward in preparing a car packed with explosives for a brother to go detonate in enemy lines — you would get the same reward as the brother who pushes the button and sends 50 kuffaar (unbelievers) to hell.”

ISIS wants to hire fitness trainers to make sure jihadists do “sit ups, jogs, sprints, muscle building” because “some brothers come in with a lot of extra ‘barakah’ on them which needs to be burnt off.”

The extremist group want to hire new police officers to patrol the streets and violently enforce strict Islamic dress codes and Sharia law.

“They are the ones who carry out the public lashings and beheadings,” Al-Britani explained. “They walk the streets with their sticks, punishing all those who break the law.”

The group wants to hire schoolteachers to instructing the “next generation … the correct Islamic teachings.”

“Imagine the reward in nurturing a child upon tawheed (oneness with God) and jihad (holy struggle)!” Hussain wrote. “All his efforts and deeds he does due to you teaching him will earn you huge rewards. And many of these children are the sons and daughters of Mujahedeen and martyrs.”

The terrorist organization is looking to doctors, chefs and mechanics in addition to front line soldiers and fighters to keep its military operations running.

They are looking to hire a security officer for checkpoints in ISIS-held territories, Al-Britani describes as a “fun and rewarding job” that entails searching cars for banned items and spotting evidence of any offenses against Sharia law.

If they’re looking teachers and bomb makers how about  Bill Ayers and his wife Bernardine Dohrn, they have views of the U.S. that go hand in hand with those of ISIS and they are a two for one deal, considering they’re both teachers and bomb makers.

If they’re looking for a press spokesman, how about State Department spokeswoman Marie Harf? Harf thinks the U.S. should kill ISIS with kindness by giving them jobs and equal opportunity and is keen on helping ISIS build its economy.