• What’s Up with Joe Biden’s ‘No Malarkey’ Tour?

    Surge Summary: Despite its clever theme – “No Malarkey” – Joe Biden’s presidential campaign doesn’t seem to be catching on like he’d hoped. 

     by Andrew Allen

    Haven’t heard much about Joe Biden’s “No Malarkey Tour”. Is it over?  Did Joe tour Iowa and find that in fact, there was not a speck of malarkey anywhere to be found?

    I have visions of Bidenistas, most around my mom’s age (she’s in her upper 60s), wearing “No Malarkey Tour” t-shirts the way kids that smoked cigarettes in middle school back in the 80s – the 1980s – have to say it because, I mean, Biden is the topic, right? – wore Motley Crue, Ozzy, and the occasional Foreigner t-shirt.

    I remember one day I went to use the restroom because I really, really, really had to go.  The place was full of cigarette smoke.  I came out and the Vice Principal was standing there. He grabbed me and barked “Anybody smoking in there?”  I was an Izod shirt-wearing nerd in 8th grade. I told the Vice Principal “I don’t know”, and ran, wishing I had one of those cool rock t-shirts to wear because if I had one, I could’ve exempted myself from every rule and regulation that existed in my middle school.  Like the ones about Burisma, getting hookers in DC nightclubs prego, and leaving crack pipes in rental cars out in Arizona while dad tells the CFR stories about quid pro quo’ing foreign governments.  My middle school was very mature you see – not unlike DC and the media today.

    I don’t want to wear a “No Malarkey Tour” t-shirt though, not even if Biden is elected and then we are all required to wear “No Malarkey Tour” t-shirts to get ticket discounts at local theaters when “Cornpop”, “Cornpop 2”, “Cornpop3”, and the prequel “The Kernal and the Biden” come out.  I expect Samuel L Jackson will play Cornpop.  Not sure who will play Biden, though I hear Hunter could use the work.

    I’m waiting for the “23 Skidoo Tour”, the “Flapjack Joe and Whaddya Know Tour”, and the “Hey Kid, Whaddya Do for Kicks Tour”.  Lawrence Welk would find those retro I’m sure.

    The views here are those of the author and not necessarily Daily Surge.

    Image: Screen shot; CBS News; https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W9DUsz_ezsw

    Andrew Allen (@aandrewallen) grew up in the American southeast and for more than two decades has worked as an information technoloigies professional in various locations around the globe. A former far-left activist, Allen became a conservative in the late 1990s following a lengthy period spent questioning his own worldview. When not working IT-related issues or traveling, Andrew Allen spends his time discovering new ways to bring the pain by exposing the idiocy of liberals and their ideology.

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